Mother's Day was nice, busy, and full of all types of emotion. Both sets of grandparents where here, because it was also my graduation weekend. We went to church, lunch, checked out a new garden nursery, took the kids swimming at the hotel, and then back to the house for pizza and a cake to celebrate Tensae's 5th birthday (since we corrected her age and received her new birth certificate). I am so blessed to be the mother of my two wonderful children and at the same time I felt a lot of grief on Mother's Day for the losses that my daughter and her birth family have endured.
I wish I had a picture of her birth mother for her, I wish I knew more so that I could answer all those questions that will come some day, but most of all I pray that her remaining family members are safe and healthy in Ethiopia. International adoption is not a easy process, logistically or emotionally. I know that before I met my daughter, very brave and loving people made very difficult decisions that changed their and her fate. I am not one to say that "She was perfect or made for our family", because that would mean that people were lost so that she could be ours and I don't think that is how things work. Is it a miracle that, we went into the adoption plan not knowing how it would work out and we received so much support to make this possible and she just turned out to have a personality that does fit in very well with our family and she is thriving? Yes I think that is a huge miracle that all the pieces fell into place and perhaps yes, God had a plan in making this happen once her fate had been irreparably changed. But I still grieve for the losses that she has experienced and the answers that she will never have and the picture of her as a baby with her birth mother that I will never see. I am extremely grateful that I was entrusted to raise her as my child and I will someday take her back to visit her birth place in Ethiopia and teach her that I do know that her birth mother was wise, beautiful, brave and loving just like the child that we both have called daughter.